By Matt Lesser, author, keynote and owner, Uniquely Normal, LLC
In 2017, the idea for the “Flourishing Life Model” 1 was born; however, it was incomplete. The first four levels – diminishing, surviving, striving, thriving – were developed, but it was not for another three years, in 2020, the top of the model – flourishing – finalized.
The “Flourishing Life Model,” first presented in the book, unSatisfied: When Less is More 2, was demonstrated as a growth and development tool to help people take responsibility for their lives, to make intentional choices to live their best lives and to become the best version of who they are meant to be. In the follow-up book, unEngaged: Building Flourishing Organizations 3, the model is applied to organizational culture and leadership as a tool for helping leaders intentionally invest in, develop and place their team members in roles where they become the best version of who they are meant to become.
The model, at its core, is a powerful tool for leaders and managers to use to equip their team members to become the most productive, highly engaged and optimal version of who they are intended to be.
Definitions
A brief, high-level description of each of the levels will establish a common understanding and shared language about the model.
Diminishing. People have all but given up, or “quit” – on life, their job or career, family, friends, marriage, physical condition, hobbies and community engagement. Usually overwhelmed or disillusioned, these people have adopted a “helpless” mentality and are on a fast-track to “hopeless”… if they have not arrived at that place already.
Surviving. People do whatever it takes to get through, “survive,” another day. They get up, they go through the motions, they accomplish the routine, they check the boxes, they punch the clock, to do what it takes to meet the expectations of others so they can have – from their perspective – a small measure of freedom to do whatever it is they want to do (e.g., exercise, fish, hunt, read, play games, sleep, drink, watch television, etc.). Often not optimistic about the future or hopeful their position in life will change, they often are relegated to their “plot” in life. While it is possible to spend most of one’s reality at the “surviving” level, many people at the “surviving” level either move down to “diminishing” or up to “striving.”
Striving. People have grown frustrated, even angry, with “surviving” and decide to take responsibility, demonstrate ownership and do something about it. Intentionality becomes the rallying cry at this level as a person may decide to pursue education, enroll in training, gain new skill sets, seek out a coach or mentor, or sign up for projects, tasks or activities where the person’s skills may be developed or highlighted. Often filled with a new sense of hope and optimism, these people adopt a “whatever it takes” mentality to grow, develop and become better, wiser and more self-actualized version of the people they envision they can become.
Thriving. These people are proverbially “hitting on all cylinders.” Usually experiencing success in their professional lives, they often are performing well, advancing and considered as experts or leaders in their field of interest. At this level, the focus is on performance, continued succes, and protecting what has been earned along the way. While often thriving professionally, there are often other dimensions or roles that experience surviving or even diminishing – marriage, parenting, community engagement, physical health and spiritual growth. While it is possible to spend years – sometimes decades—at the thriving level, it often is to the detriment of other, more meaningful areas of life and living. The two key differentiators between “thriving” and “flourishing” are the following: motive and focus. This will be unpacked at the “flourishing” level.
Flourishing. A person transcends success and shifts one’s motive and focus. While thriving is a focus on self and accumulation—money, possessions, power, titles, degrees, awards – flourishing is a focus on others and on legacy – giving back, investing in others, coming alongside, engaging in impact – focused activities that outlive the person, empowering others, aligning living to core values. When a person’s motivation and focus shifts from “me” to “you” and “we,” and from “I want” and “I consume” to “I give” and “I contribute,” the person is moving from thriving to flourishing. In organizations, those who intentionally pursue flourishing in their lives and living are the ones the organization needs to empower to coach, mentor and train emerging and other leaders. Why? Because the focus is on building something that is greater than any one person, and the time horizon often is longer than any one person’s lifetime. Flourishing is about coming alongside others to help them become the best version of who they can become – for their organizations, their spouses, their children and their communities – to live life to the fullest.
The foundation for the “Flourishing Life Model” is built upon three pillars:
- Empathy: Intentionally and fully listening and understanding another person. Communicating that every person has worth and is valued, seen, understood and loved. At its core, empathy is about getting behind the eyeballs of others and seeing their perspective and walking in their shoes to understand what they think and feel (to the best that one can do this).
- Empowerment: Fully equipping, training, granting authority and releasing team members to do what they are hired to do. In other words, effective delegation. Effective delegation starts with clear communication of the role, expectations, deliverables and timelines. Then, it is about equipping with the tools, knowledge and skills to do the job with excellence. Next, it is transferring authority and ensuring the other person accepts that authority. This is followed by responsibility – the person accepts the responsibility of what is delegated, including execution and results. Delegation does not work without accountability; however, accountability is not micro-management or “you have to earn my trust” mentality. Accountability is holding the team member responsible for what was delegated, as well as the results expected, which leads to consequences. Consequences are communicated up front – both if results meet or exceed expectations, and if results fall short.
- Excellence: Excellence is both a mindset and an execution strategy; a way of doing business that permeates and integrates everything the organization does. It is not perfection; however, it is being fully committed to give and to do one’s very best, offering 100% engagement every day.
Empathy, Empowerment and Excellence are the pillars of a flourishing organization; however, building a flourishing organization where every team member can flourish requires intentionality.
Application
Leadership is first and foremost about people and relationships. The greatest gifts that leaders can provide the people they lead are the following: listening and understanding. Why? Because people have an innate desire to be heard, seen, understood, valued and loved. Leaders who lead people to flourish understand that it is about equipping, training, modeling and empowering people to become the best version of who they are created to be.
How is the “Flourishing Life Model” applied to organizational culture? It starts with a conversation, by listening intently and understanding where the person is on the “Flourishing Life Model.” The following questions are helpful to understanding and placement on the model:
- How do you feel/think about your current job?
- Do you enjoy going to work on Monday mornings, or do you experience something else?
- If you could do anything in the world professionally, what would you do?
- What are your dreams for your work and your profession? What is keeping you from pursuing those dreams (if the person is not pursuing them)?
- What is your greatest frustration with your professional life? Life in general?
- What motivates you? What excites you?
- In what areas of your life do you feel empowered? Unempowered? What can you do in the unempowered areas to become empowered?
- What causes you anxiety? What keeps you awake at night?
- How would you describe the next one/three/five years of your professional life: hopeful, excited, dread, anxious, love it, optimistic, pessimistic? Your personal life?
- If you could change one thing about your professional life, what would it be? Your personal life? What is keeping you from making these changes?
This is a small sample of questions that could be asked. Once a person’s level on the “Flourishing Life Model” is identified, the journey shifts to putting together a plan of action to help the person acknowledge the current reality, take responsibility and intentionally start making choices that will help the person learn, grow and develop to higher levels on the model.
Organizations Are People; People Are Organizations
As a result, the most important investment leaders of organizations can make is in the people and culture of the organization. Every organization has a culture; that is not the issue. The issue is this: What kind of a culture do you want to have in the organization? If a healthy culture where every team member can flourish is wanted, it will take time, resources and intentionality; it will not just happen on its own or by happenstance.
Organizations with flourishing cultures experience the following benefits:
- Easier time recruiting and hiring (often, there is a waiting list to get in)
- Lower turnover (turnover costs 25%-400% of the annual compensation for each position turned over)
- Higher engagement (low engagement costs up to 40% of productivity in organizations with unhealthy or toxic cultures).
- Longer loyalty and commitment
- Greater ownership mentality
- Lower waste and higher margins
The process of building a flourishing organization is
simple-to-understand:
- Beginning with a conversation,
- Putting together a plan of action (must include the leadership team and often includes training, workshops, coaching and mentoring, retreats, strategic planning, a robust communication plan, documenting processes and SOPs and best practices, and above all, intentionality and long-term commitment),
- Executing the plan (it is all about the execution!),
- Measuring the results, and
- Adjusting and modifying, as necessary.
A simpler way of identifying the process is the following:
- Here. Assess the current state.
- There. Figure out where you want to go.
- Path. Map out the journey from “here” to “there.”
In creating an organizational culture where every team member can flourish (not everyone will choose to pursue flourishing), the rising tide concept will be created, and the organization will experience higher engagement, healthier relationships and greater team camaraderie, leading to greater results as the proverbial ship rises higher and higher. Keep pressing on in the journey! n
Matt Lesser is the founder and CEO of Uniquely Normal, LLC, which exists to equip and train leaders to build flourishing organizations through empathy, empowerment and excellence. He has trained leaders, teams, and boards in over 40 countries over the past 20+ years. Prior to launching Uniquely Normal, Lesser owned and operated businesses and served in several C-Suite roles across various industries. He earned undergraduate degrees from Indiana University and an MBA from Taylor University and is certified in nearly 20 personality, team building and leadership assessments. Additionally, Lesser is the best-selling author of unSatisfied: When Less is More; his second book, unEngaged: Building Flourishing Organizations, was released in late 2023. He serves as an adjunct professor and has served on several boards of directors both domestically and internationally.
More information: [email protected], www.uniquelynormal.com
References
- Flourishing Life Model. Copyright © 2022 by Matthew Q. Lesser and Uniquely Normal, LLC.
- Matthew Q. Lesser. unSatisfied: When Less is More (Lioncrest Publishing, 2022).
- Matthew Q. Lesser. unEngaged: Building Flourishing Organizations (Ballast Books, 2023).
Photo courtesy of Jimmy Renallo, Creative Technology.